It’s been a busy few dog days. Last week, me and the humans went to the park in town where there was some kind of queuing festival and dog parade. There was more to whiff than I could take in. We stood in a queue at the start of our visit and talked to strangers. Human often talks to strangers. Funny business. Stranger had a nice dog called Jack. Jack was happy to be there and was somewhat of an old pro to this dog parade lark. I decided, if it was ok for Jack, then it was ok for me. Eventually, we got to the front of the queue, and some of the humans must have been new to the system of standing in lines, as they were all over the place. At the front table were some humans sitting at tables. Perhaps they were tired from the queuing. Human wrote down some things, handed over some money. I think she wanted a turn in the chair. She didn’t get one. She did get a label with the number 186 and my name written on it.
We left Jack. His human appeared to be trying to hire the chair. But we moved on, so I don’t know if they had more luck than us.
There were various areas fenced off, for the different kinds of dog parade, I suppose. We went to the chip van and waited for two grumpy humans to finish arguing so that they could make our chips. It was like a really bad Punch and Judy show, but there were no puppets, and the voices sounded like their own. Also, no one clapped at the end. (But sometimes that happens at the end of Punch and Judy too.)
Eventually it was time to parade me around with lots of other dogs. We lined up and waited. A big grey haired human came and touched all of the dogs and said things in a cheery, sing song voice. She had a little bit of a whiff, but anyone touching that many dogs is going to pick up a whiff. I liked it. I liked her. She pointed at lots of dogs who were allowed to stay for the end of the parade, but me and human had to leave, with lots of others. They looked sad, but I was happy. I was fairly tired of all the whiffs, so soon we came home, and I got extra treats for being me. Funny business.
I like dog parades. I like Jack. I don’t like Punch and Judy, either with, or without puppets.