For those who know me, you’ll be familiar with my need for new and interesting whiffs. There’s nothing quite as satisfying as discovering a good whiff in an unexpected place. This week I’ve had a whiff of a completely different kind. I’ve had a whiff of freedom. And it was gooood.
Human took me over to the park. She’s in a pretty good routine, and my efforts to train her are really starting to pay off. She usually has some fairly decent treats in her pocket, and she’s not at all stingy with them. (Unlike the tall human who never brings ANYTHING to eat on a walk.) She does require me to perform like some circus clown sometimes, by sending me away and then immediately calling me back (like some delinquent). But I usually take pity on what perhaps is low self esteem and separation anxiety, and go running back to her as requested.
Well, either she’s lost the plot or her mind was elsewhere, as I noticed she’d dropped my string and seemed thoroughly unconcerned about it. Funny business. I stayed fairly close by in case she exhibited other strange behaviour. I know she feeds me foul breakfasts, and torments me with the vacuum cleaner, but I’m quite fond of her.
Perhaps she’ll begin to do it more often. Paws crossed.
I like the whiff of the seaside.
I’ve been to Southsea and Bornemouth and I like the smell of both. There is a strange surface under foot that moves when you walk on it. It sticks to my nose too – funny business. The small humans dig holes in it. I like to dig holes. I like the small humans. There’s moving water that keeps pretending to chase me and then it moves away again, and then it pretends to chase me, and then it moves away again, and then…well, you get the idea. I quite like the game, but it gets a bit predictable.
I have been barking at passing dogs. There are dogs at the seaside that aren’t allowed to come and play with me. Their humans seem to be set on walking past with as little fun and conversation as is possible. So I bark. I think it helps, in case they haven’t seen me. So far all that happens is my human gets quite cross and speaks to me with a grumpy voice, while pulling my string tight.
Will I ever get off this string?
It’s been a busy few dog days. Last week, me and the humans went to the park in town where there was some kind of queuing festival and dog parade. There was more to whiff than I could take in. We stood in a queue at the start of our visit and talked to strangers. Human often talks to strangers. Funny business. Stranger had a nice dog called Jack. Jack was happy to be there and was somewhat of an old pro to this dog parade lark. I decided, if it was ok for Jack, then it was ok for me. Eventually, we got to the front of the queue, and some of the humans must have been new to the system of standing in lines, as they were all over the place. At the front table were some humans sitting at tables. Perhaps they were tired from the queuing. Human wrote down some things, handed over some money. I think she wanted a turn in the chair. She didn’t get one. She did get a label with the number 186 and my name written on it.
We left Jack. His human appeared to be trying to hire the chair. But we moved on, so I don’t know if they had more luck than us.
There were various areas fenced off, for the different kinds of dog parade, I suppose. We went to the chip van and waited for two grumpy humans to finish arguing so that they could make our chips. It was like a really bad Punch and Judy show, but there were no puppets, and the voices sounded like their own. Also, no one clapped at the end. (But sometimes that happens at the end of Punch and Judy too.)
Eventually it was time to parade me around with lots of other dogs. We lined up and waited. A big grey haired human came and touched all of the dogs and said things in a cheery, sing song voice. She had a little bit of a whiff, but anyone touching that many dogs is going to pick up a whiff. I liked it. I liked her. She pointed at lots of dogs who were allowed to stay for the end of the parade, but me and human had to leave, with lots of others. They looked sad, but I was happy. I was fairly tired of all the whiffs, so soon we came home, and I got extra treats for being me. Funny business.
I like dog parades. I like Jack. I don’t like Punch and Judy, either with, or without puppets.